Pacifica!

I have this strange candle obsession, and I have recently taken it so far as to start coveting a specific brand: Pacifica. For some reason I am utterly certain that Pacifica Soy Candles are the most amazing on the planet. They smell unbelievable, they feel soft and squishy, and they look so darn classy. My problem is, I am sort of cheap. I just don't see the point in spending over $10 on a candle. Heck, who should even be spending more than $5 on a single candle? So, for the longest time, I have lusted for the Pacifica Tuscan Blood Orange Candle. I kept telling myself over and over again that someday when I have an amazing, high paying, full time, permanent job, I am going to spend $100 JUST on these ridiculous Pacifica Soy Candles. Because (until today), I have never owned one before.

Luckily for me, Cyberite and I went shopping on Main Street in Vancouver today and came across a store that was selling older scents of Pacifica candles for 50% off the original price of $14. I think $7 is pretty ridiculous for a small candle... but not for a Pacifica! So now I am the owner of a ridiculously overpriced candle, and I couldn't be happier. It isn't my Tuscan Blood Orange, but Persian Rose is good enough until the cash flow increases!

New Dove Film

I wanted to share this film. It brings tears to my eyes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaH4y6ZjSfE

Silly Chatelaine

I go to the gym to do cardio five days a week, and a major part of what makes it so tolerable is the ability to read magazines while exercising. However, this poses a bit of a problem... I need to read 1 entire magazine per 30 minute workout. This means that I need to have 20 magazines to read PER MONTH. I don't mind reading older magazines, but there is nothing worse than reading the same magazine over and over again. My gym is not particularly good about their magazine selection, either. For some reason there seem to only be copies of Lou Lou, the New York Times Magazine, and Wired. You would think they would have a few fitness magazines, but evidently not. I guess they figure that their audience consists of compulsive shoppers, those interested in primarily American news, and techies.

At any rate, today I discovered a magazine I hadn't yet seen, so I hopped all over the chance to breeze through it. Honestly, I was pretty desperate for reading material. The magazine? Chatelaine. Now, I am CLEARLY not the target demographic for this particular magazine. It seems to be targeting middle aged women living in your stereotypical nuclear family type of situation. However, I did manage to find something that appealed to me... recipes! One of the activities I recently discovered is cooking; I'm a vegetarian, and people tend to think that we eat only salad, so I find it satisfying to come across creative vegetarian recipes that blow my friends away.

Chatelaine basically just served as a gateway to "Chatelaine.com," the site I am now joining in order to acquire free recipes. I feel so... domestic. But how can I resist 21 of their "hottest" pasta recipes!?

It's In You To Give?

Today was a relatively busy day as it started with 5 hours of meetings, back to back. Nothing really that exciting. Then in the evening, Trybaby, Cybernite and I went to Canadian Blood Services to donate blood. Trybaby had made an appointment last week to donate blood, so we decided to tag along with him and donate blood as well. Cybernite had forgotten to make an appointment, so I said she could take mine. Trybaby went through the process almost entirely before we found out that Cybernite couldn't donate because the acceptable hemoglobin level in her blood was off by .1, whatever that even means. You'd think when they are operating at 60% of what they REALLY need to save lives, they would put aside the standard just a bit, especially when we had been told by a nurse there that really this hemoglobin number was no big deal. Anyhow, I decided to suck it up and donate blood in lieu of Cybernite.

Now, I should probably mention, I am petrified of needles. I don't even like acknowledging the fact that I have organs, veins, or blood. I really just wanted to get the entire experience over with as quickly as possible, but before you donate blood in Canada you have to go through a rigid screening process. First, they pricked my fingertip to check my glucose. Apparently I passed this test with no problem, so they then made me fill out a questionnaire with about 30 questions. The questions were an interesting mix of interrogation on what drugs I took or didn't take, who I did or didn't have sex with, and what countries I had or hadn't been to/lived in/had sex in/had blood transfusions in. After filling this out, I had to go to another screening room, where they took my blood pressure and temperature, and then asked me tons of really awkward questions. The MOST awkward thing of all, however, was when they checked my arms for IV drug use. I had a scar on my wrist from an incident with a razor a while back, and the woman thought it was some sort of drug related scar. She had me then tell her where it was from, and recorded the scar on the paper. I think that is insane. It annoyed me to no end.

By the time I finally was ready to give blood, I was insanely irritated. How many times do they have to ask you if you have HIV/AIDS? Seriously. To top off my annoyance, after they took the blood and I was ready to recover, they brought me to the refreshment room which was full of trans fat, processed food, and sugar. The "alternative food option" was fricken Bits and Bites, which are loaded with fat and sodium. It was sick. A vegan person would just have been held prisoner there forever until they ate, because nothing was even remotely vegan. Have these people not heard of fruit? Seriously.

Honestly, I was hesitant to donate blood in the first place, because in Canada they don't let homosexual men donate blood. This is ridiculous, even from the perspective of organizations like the British Columbia Persons With Aids Society... according to stats, women shouldn't be able to give blood either. Basically they should only take blood from lesbians, virgins, and straight men. Sounds like some sort of sacrifice...But really, NOT donating blood in the mindset of a protest or boycott really doesn't punish Canadian Blood Services; it really only punishes people who need blood to save their lives. Canadian Blood Services may annoy me, but it's probably a small price to pay knowing that I will be saving a few people's lives with my untainted lesbian blood (tee hee).

Anyhow, it wasn't such a terrible experience after all. I was pissed at first about the IV drug use/scar association, and was terribly pissed that I had to eat Bits and Bites, but then I came home and discovered you lose 650 calories when you donate blood. So I had hot chocolate with TONS of whipped cream.

Reciprocal Hag Relationships

Even when I was a "straight girl," I never really had any desire to engage in any form of Fag Haggery. I don't know what it is, but stereotypical gay males just don't appeal to me. I've never found myself wanting to take a gay man shopping with me (as if gay men just naturally know what to buy when shopping...), or chat with a gay man about how cuuuuuute boys are (barf). Now it seems like women are actually encouraged to get "their own" gay man... and of course, should they accidentally fall in love with their very own gay man, they can purchase a book such as "Girls Who Like Boys Who Like Boys: True Tales of Love, Lust, and Friendship Between Straight Women and Gay Men." One can even take the "Are You a Fabulous Fag Hag?" Test. Clearly Fag Haggery is at its all-time peak.

But what about lesbians? Why don't we get hags? Surely lesbians must be good enough at something so important that straight men would want to hang around with us. Oh yeah, I forgot, they just want to watch us have sex. My bad.

After coming out, I did end up meeting a lot of gay men. Hanging out in a queer space all the time will do that to you. I ended up meeting one particular gay man, Trybaby, who I now consider to be one of my best friends. However, this poses an interesting question to me... have Trybaby and I developed a form of reciprocal hag relationship? Is it possible for a lesbian to be a hag, or is the role of hag limited to straight girls? At the same time, is it possible that lesbians can in fact have hags in the form of a gay man?

I still am not completely sure.

But anyway, if you want to take a stab at Fag Haggery, you may want to check out Ellen Forney's "How To Be a Fabulous Fag Hag" Comic.

Cuddly As A Bunny Vs. Penis Pokey

I was at Winners today and my partner pointed out the book "Picture Me Cuddly As A Bunny," which is essentially a childs book with a huge hole in it so you can insert your child's photo and view them as several types of furries. The book reminded us both instantly of "Penis Pokey."

How disturbing.

Naughty or Nice?

I'm sort of in this awkward position right now regarding how I will behave in this blog... I would say I am generally a pretty nice person... I'm open-minded, queer positive, very liberal, non-judgmental for the MOST part. However, who the hell wants to read someone's lovey dovey happy journal? I certainly don't. I mean, sure I have several people on my Livejournal Friend's list that are really sugary sweet and I think they are great, but who am I kidding.... the best people to have on your blog are people who are angry! Bitter! Bitchy! Dramatic! Drama in media appears for a reason... people want to see it...

Not that I am considering writing about the drama in my personal life. Hell no. I have no interest in even opening that can of worms on this blog (heh, that's what Livejournal is for!). However, I am sort of torn between being my regular, nice self and whether or not I should unleash my inner fury... all my bitterness and judgment, sprinkled with a bit of feminist anger.

Is the internet ready for it?

Oh Venus... how will you be born?

Anony-Miss

I guess I will start this new endeavor off by explaining why I decided to start this blog in the first place. I've been a "blogger" for about 5 years now, as I am an avid Livejournal user. But I suppose there is something about Livejournal that doesn't seem very "bloggish" to me. Not that it isn't a great site or anything, because it is; it's just that it feels like more of a message board where you converse with people or something you use to create a network. My Livejournal, which I still use, is also full of pictures of myself, my friends, and my family. It is full of personal accounts of my life. It is full of things I probably wouldn't want to share with the world, but most of all, things the general population probably wouldn't give a shit about anyway. Additionally, it is "Friends Only," which means in El-Jay land, that only people who I list as "friends" can read my entries.

I want to move beyond that... while I will still maintain my Livejournal, which will always be full of personal accounts of my life and will read much like a diary, I want a space where I can rant and rave without anyone knowing who I am, where I live, what I do. I want an anonymous sounding board where what I say matters, not necessarily who I am.